Spider Phobia Sufferer T-Shirts

"It's not the persistent lack of sunlight or freezing temperatures that bother me - it's the crowds I can't stand."

Dinner at the Trapdoors

The Amazing Man-Spider

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

Yeah, it's funny, but you'll see, in this house, it's the guy who screams the loudest...

"Wait—what did I come into this room to do?"

Extreme Bungy

'Who wants to be examined first?'

"You can’t just go up the waterspout whenever you hear something you don’t like!"

Child makes a toy and frightens himself.

"Sorry, Pal. Sometimes nature's not very pretty."

Idle parts

'Sure, but will you still love me when I bite off your head and eat it?'

'I want you to bring me one.'

'Looks like the soup comes with flies.'

Spider Web Stocking

OMG UR HOT

'Well it's too bad you're not a black widow like me, Slyvia...'

'Are we there yet?'

'Did spiders invent bungee jumping, Dad?'

"Of all my husbands I believe the first one tasted the best."

"Now, cover your second, fourth and seventh eyes and read the next line."

"Don't worry - you've got to expect a few midge bites on holiday..."

"I wish I had known you have arachnophobia before I paid."

'I'm just surfing the web.'

'The trick is to label straight away, otherwise I forget what I have in my larder...'

'Rats, we've caught a dung beetle: They taste horrible...'

"I do appreciate that it eats other bugs, but it also ate my husband."

Spider watching his web cam.

"Bloody hell, Mavis. . . I was just doing yoga!"

Spiders in love

'Dulcifying araneids didn't make them any more sapid.'

'Man, when was the last time you had your eyes tested?'