Speculation Enthusiasts Gifts

Today on the Ask Sadie Show, we'll be addressing one single topic: Wondering. In my day, when a body said I wonder why dust bunnies are called dust bunnies, it led to all sorts of delightful speculation. We could while away hours debating whether it was a marketing ploy by big broom ... or whether it dated back to Napoleon, who had a fetish for dirty rabbits. And if we were lucky, opinions could get so heated that fisticuffs would ensue. Wondering is just one of many lovely human experiences utt

'Oh yeah, your dad might be on 4-1 in this afternoon's race, but mine is on 3-1!'

'Look on the bright side; you got out of that stock before it became...unstable.'

"My name's Edwin, and I'm addicted to risk."

"What the hell happened to this town?"

'I used to trade in futures until I learned the planet doesn't have one.'

'I'm a 100% consistent investor. I buy bonds when I should buy stocks when I should buy bonds.'

'The market dropped sharply on the rumor that new sell off rumors in the financial sector will lead to more widespread rumors...'

"Facts are good, but we need all the rumors, gossip, and speculation to fully understand the situation."

"It covers up all the debt."

'Kleinzweck has a theory that the strong nuclear force is actually tiny rolls of duct tape.'

Department of Pure Speculation.

Jean Philippe Rameau

'Sorry Rocko, you know how it works. Step on a crack, break your mother's back.'

International Speculators

Stock Market Adventure

'Yes, fifty to one is a great return on your money, but the muddy track makes it a risky investment.'

"You're on kid. Break a string!"

'Looks like the gods are angry.'

Energy speculation.

"...And that's the studio where we filmed the Moon Landing..."

'We're worried about your ability to lend us money.'

The Tooth Accountant

'A wonderful sermon, father; I liked the part about a time to sew and a time to reap. When would you say I should cover the naked December calls I sold last month?'

"I'm not sure what kind of luck this is."

"In the tech sector, markets reacted strongly to news that ToadNoggle would acquire Zeepzer, ending rumors of a hostile takeover by FiffleBunny."

'Giving back to the community is an excellent tax write-off strategy.'

"Your fortune: in a few minutes the rice with rotten shrimps that you ate will start making you feel very sick. We strongly recommend that you drive to the nearest hospital."

Agnostics Society: Absolute worst place to ask for directions.

'We don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's a tax deduction.'

"Whoa! Almost stepped on a crack."

'Hi, I'm Donald and I have been too enthusiastic for forty years.'

'Well I've got four rabbit's feet, and look where it got me.'

'It's been seven years bad luck.'

I ordered chrysanthemum tea. This is not chrysanthemum tea. This is chamomile. We're out chrysanthemum. I've had chrysanthemum tea every day for the last 80 years, and I'm still alive and well. Are you trying to kill me? Are all old folks this superstitious? Superstition's always worked in the past.