Spectacle Satirist Pillows

'Time you got those glasses changed Fred. . .'

Copycats

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

"Gee, thanks pal."

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

"Actually, it's more like a mouse race."

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

'I don't think the employees like me.'

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

"I'm gonna be a 'New Yorker' cartoonist. You're not supposed to understand it."

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

Volcano Sacrifice Competition

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

"I can't come in today, I'm feeling like myself."

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

German School

"I'd like to have a word with you about this spirit animal."

Man with dollar sign on his t-shirt.

The little engine that delegated

Plight of Decent-White-Male-Middle Class Scapgoats.

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

Bank P45's - 'Cashier number 5 please.'