Spartacus Fan Gifts

Updated Classics.

"You guys need to #@%!% fight harder. You're all #@%!% wimps! You call yourselves a #@%!% army? Bull%#!*!"

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

Claus 2.0

'Take it from me and come back. The future is definitely on land.'

Pirate

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

Koala

Beware of Falling Notice.

'The government's right. Not counting, food, clothing, energy, shelter, health care, or transportation, inflation is hardly going up.'

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

Designer Kangaroo Pocket

"I lettered in spelling."

Treasure Island Book.

"I don't believe in you!"

"According to the map, the treasure should be right behind that door."

Yo ho ho!

"Well, it's been nice. And obviously the £10 million win hasn't change you. . . . A mug of tea an' a couple garibaldies - as tight as ever!"

"Waiter, this is the worst meal I've ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten some crap!"

"Shall I let them breathe."

'I like to greet the new team members myself.'

'I'm down to a pack of neuroses a day.'

'We drove 800 miles for this? If I wanted to look at a roomful of dusty bottles, we could have visited your mother.'

Alarmistclock

Safety Barriers

'She's not very good. She only did three revolutions and her air wasn't all that much.'

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

"I think I see a miscreant in the carpark. There's no time to call the police I must deal with it myself."

'So that's why I didn't get that train set? !'.

"You cheap shit! Why can't we have a designer divorce?"

"Talk to me. You have wounds. I have salt."

'I've got it made in the shade. What worries me is sunshine.'

"Really Mum? Natural selection gave us short arms to stop us from picking our noses?"

'The kidnappers want 500.000,- Euros for the boss. I offered them 600.000,- Euro to keep him.'

I've founded my own religion. Of course you have, Rudy. It's off to a good start. Already, it's being mocked by people of other faiths. If history's any guide, within a couple hundred years, it'll be widely accepted and people who don't believe in it will be persecuted. What are the central tenets of your religion? A true Rudian knows that life is suffering, and winning arguments online is salvation.