Spacetime Explorer Gifts

Albert Einstein

Rocket Launch Control Centre Back in 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

Big Bang Theory.

"It's clear to me that you want to go far with this company."

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

"We can see through the troposphere, stratosphere, mesosphere and into all those distant stars up there in outer space... truly remarkable, huh, girl?"

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Alien David statue

The Solar System (after deregulation)

Outer Space Outsourcing

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

"Look what I found, dad!"

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

'But what is the universe for?'

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

"This year we decided to vacation on the 3rd rock."

"Houston, we have a problem."

"We're following Carrot Top."

Evolution.

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

God Sneezes Out Creation

How we imagined A.I. in 1977. . . How it's looking today. . .

'BANG' and a cosmology institute appears.

Man, my cat sneaks into the weirdest spots.

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

Alien Snowmen

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

"Would you relax? They never look up."

"It's the dawn of a new era"

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"No, you're in the Milky Way galaxy."