Sour-sipper Gifts

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

What the Doctor Ordered

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

"...Stop complaining if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!"

'Cooking'

"Hey! There's a hair in my soup!"

Running Latte

"Lumpy? Of course it's lumpy! Sweetbread soup is meant to be lumpy."

Liquidity Lunch

'Who orderes the roasted chicken plate and who ordered the soup?'

"How do I know if it's fresh?... You asked for 'the soup of the day'. You didn't specify what day."

"Mom, what kind of soup do we eat when we're sick?"

'Can you recommend something that will make my date sound interesting.'

"Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here."

Soup Surprise

"Sipsies?"

"It's still stew but the celebrity chef wants to call it a deconstructed steak and ale pie with a dusting of salt in a brown sauce coulis."

Chick in noodle soup.

"I'll just have a Diet Coke. I'm in the middle of my novel."

"A foot bath after a long hard day at work is really nice!"

'Beer's more than just a food -- it's a comfort food!'

"My famous chicken soup! The secret ingredient is the rum."

Common stock, Preferred stock, Private stock.

Coffee Overload: 'I'll have a low fat soy latte, no sugar, two biscotti...make that a Columbian-Kenyan bean bend...oh make it snappy, I'm in a hurry!'

"A friendly warning, pal—this is a sports bar."

'It's better to drink a little too much than much too little!'

Chicken soup is in an intravenous drip.

"Generally speaking, when his nose gives way, it means he's had enough."

'Alphabet soup. This isn't nutrition. It's education.'

Men's Parallel Bars

"Here's Bill now. I'm not sure where he's been, but I'm guessing it was the Sour Beer Festival."