Sour Savorer Gifts

"Here's Bill now. I'm not sure where he's been, but I'm guessing it was the Sour Beer Festival."

"The rolling wheels...the ringing bells...signal the deliciousness of summer."

Pasta

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

"Lumpy? Of course it's lumpy! Sweetbread soup is meant to be lumpy."

Women who Read Too Much

"The chef will accommodate gluten-free requests, but only with a note from your doctor."

Garlic, the wonderful stinking rose.

Oysters in June - delicious!

"Keep a television remote zapper handy along with a bottle of scotch whisky."

'May I recommend the monk fish, sir?

'This wine doesn't need to breathe...it needs CPR!'

"Who'd have thought a crease in the plans would result in an award for outstanding architecture?"

"You're not stepping on it right."

Fishing Quota - "Oh no! We've gone over the limit."

'Ta da! A preview of coming extractions!'

'It keeps leftover wine fresh? Does that ever happen?'

A people-meter family out enjoying the calm night breezes while claiming to be inside enjoying a rerun of 'Falcon Crest.'"

Pi-thon

For the grey nomad, life on the road had its challenges.

Conveyor belt sushi

'What makes him a wine snob? - He knows more than I do.'

"The end is near, now available on Amazon Prime."

"Quick! It's the 45 minutes a year when tomatoes taste incredible!"

"He's not a third- rate second-rate artist. He's a first-rate third-rate artist."

"Little tart?"

"I'm A Gigantic Starfish Endowed With The Gift Of Speech, Not A Miracle Worker."

Real Reality Shows...

Sharks surround the White House

"There's nothing like coiling up with a good book."

"I'm not blowing to cool it down, I'm trying to warm it up!"

The Specials