Sonic Savant Gifts

Large hi fi.

Felix Mendelssohn

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

'Theaters from Hell' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

Sir Edward Elgar

Poetry repairman

Antonin Leopold Dvorak

TV Producers Workshop. The first goal of a series to avoid cancellation long enough to issue a DVD set. Get boxed before you get canned!

"Remember, son, you can be anything you want to be...except for maybe an aroma therapist."

The Music Lover.

"The dove certainly helped, but GPS really nailed it."

"Oh, we'll hang Kaiser BIll to the sour-apple tree..."

Anton Bruckner.

Computer grabs man and tells him to stop it.

Ernie's Music. Ernie, you're opening a music store? Yep, I'm going to serve a niche market. I won't be selling CD's or any other digital music. I also won't be selling the old cassette or eight-track tapes. I'm only selling records. I'm catering to audiophiles who appreciate the unique sound quality they deliver. That's great! Are you going to adverties? Yeah, my tagline is "All sales vinyl"

Benjamin Britten

There's the pay TV remote, the set top box remote, the TV remote...now where did I put the worth watching remote?

Sergei Prokofiev.

Algernon Swinburne

'My best attribute? That would be my glottal stop.'

'Here's a song that's been done to death.'

'He was offered a role in a sitcom and has the potential to be a successful child actor. We've already set up a legal defense fund.'

'Milton, you really did make it to the other side!'

'Alright! Alright! So I made a mistake!'

Ludwig van Beethoven

"These are my parents, the bingers. Mom binges on shows, and dad on food."

''Solar energy'? -- like I don't do enough for the little twerps already!'

"How many times are young going to playback that last episode of 'Friends'?"

Thug takes dog badger baiting with 'Set Nav'.

"Frankly, I think they've been completely obnoxious ever since they went solar."

Benjamin Britten.

The apes make advances in grooming techniques.

Wow, is that the new lithotripter? No, it's the new Dolby surround sound system, with extra-tech woofers.

Wow! He can hear a song just once and then play it? Yeah, he has a phonographic memory!

'We're going solar power all the way!'