Soil Philosophers T-Shirts

"You've never planted a garden before, have you?"

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

"It says here that people can't live without soil. I knew it!"

'As Chuck's definition of terroir dragged past the 20-minute mark, Suzy concluded, the longer the explanation, the less likely you know what the word means.'

"Bob! Your manure's here!"

'That plant food really works!'

Garden Shop: Top Soil. Bottom Soil.

-A garden uses a lot of water. -Most of it perspiration.

"I say we settle around here, there's no chemical aftertaste to the soil: Must be an organic farmer..."

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

'I know that's what your father calls it, Sweetheart...but a nicer word for it is fertilizer!'

'The good news is I just dethatched the lawn. The bad news is the lawn was nothing but thatch. . .'

How's this mulch for improving my soil? Not good. It's full of toxic wood chips. They poison the dirt and don't decompose. Just what I need. Subprime loam.

The timing doesn't work for eco-club to start a garden. I have a better idea. Build a compost bin. You can recycle the school's leaves and grass clippings. You'll have good soil for a garden next spring. That's not enough time for college admissions essays. Write about the trauma of delayed gratification. Never heard of it.

User friendly soil.

"What do you mean, we don't have an 'exit strategy'?!"

I'm looking for a job?

Worm Appreciation Society!

'Boy this is a great garden: You can taste the natural compost and fertilizer...'

Earthly Delights Garden Centre

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

'Try to relax, Ed. It's a beach, not sandy soil.'

'I think we found the spot where you spilled the fertilizer.'

'Don't follow my example and become a beast of burden: Study hard at school!'

A misery of mole hills

'Anything else need tying up?'

'I find that an hour in the compost pile provides my minimum daily requirement of everything.'

Worrying about college costs isn't helping. Let's get to work. I'll take that customer. Tree's Tree Nursery. That was a good start toward college! Indeed. Another 25 hydrangeas and we'll almost have enough for your first botony textbook.

Google Earth, Google Peet

"Storm’s comin’, Clara. Better get my absentee ballot in."

"Oh, boy! My favorite! plotting soil!"

'So aunt Lois I hear you've developed quite a green thumb.'

'These lousy free-range chickens think that they just own the whole world!'

Heaven's Cattlegrid.