Sofa Squatter Gifts

"I thought I placed myself on a 'Do not call' list from you people. Well, as long as you're here, can you put Mom on?"

"I've no idea. Maybe it's the slumber channel."

'She'll never look for me here.'

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

"The couch hates me Jane!"

"Oh, goody. More reality-based crap."

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

My comfort zone

Library: The Weight lifting Section.

"I wonder which will come first. Me finishing this binge worthy Netflix series or another Netflix rate hike."

"The Procrastination World Championships were only a month away. He never trained so hard."

'Ed's always been a bit of a dreamer.'

'We added on to the couch.'

"Sorry dear! I'm very busy right now."

"She died doing what she loved."

Chillaxing!

'He's part Great Dane and part couch potato.'

Keeping fit by weight training with 'le creuset' saucepans

"I was thinking we might staycation on the sofa."

'We've found it Chandler- The forbidden temple!'

"It might be this Christmas, it might be next."

Plein Air Painting: Quarantine Edition

Sofa Sale: 'I like this sofa - I'll take it.'

'Plus, you get to keep any change you happen to find under the cushions.'

"Thanks to technology, I can be unemployed no matter where I live!"

"I'm not so sure anymore where the sofa ends and you begin."

"It's a couch, not a settee, you posh git!"

"I'm looking for an arrangement that says, 'Sorry about the sofa.'"

"OK, I'll let you in, but remember: If you scratch it, you buy it!"

"I remember when you used to hold a scepter instead of that remote."

'It didn't take HIM long to feel at home!'

'I hadn't realised we were such a sofa loving nation.'

"I'm so special that I even get my very own blanket for the sofa."