Society Maven Gifts

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

Muscles

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

"He's going to be O.K., but he still wants you to remarry."

"Forget sugar and spice and everything nice. I'm going for buns of steel!"

"The Leonardos, the Raphaels, Titians, Veroneses, Giottos... Italy wants them back, all 427 of them."

"Yes, social media's a great way to express your opinions - shame you feel 'ignored and unappreciated by an aloof, faceless boss' - but that's because I haven't a clue who you are or what you do around here!"

Enterpe, Terpsichore, Calliope, and Bernie, their agent.

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

'Let us pray...'

"Let me connect you with Edith, our specialist in ethnic conflict in the former Yugoslavia. My expertise happens to be in North Korean intransigence."

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

Man blending in to his chair is reading Optical Illusion Monthly magazine.

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

"You'll have to forgive Roland. He still uses 'stomach' and 'abdominals' interchangeably."

Guide reading book called 'A farewell to arms.'

Leonardo Da Vinci paints a selfie

'We unfortunately had to compress our dinosaur area due to budget cuts. On the bright side, TyrannoTriStegoApatoHadroPlesioSaurodon Rex here is now the museum's most popular exhibit.'

"We need to create more hashtag-worthy moments."

"When it comes to online marketing, I'm puzzled."

"Arthur, I need my space."

The sunglasses.

"Is Madonna amazing or what? She sings, dances, and acts, and now it turns out she's a writer, too."

Donald Trump

"Okay lets go. You can message your friends after dinner."

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."