Societal Commentary Gifts

How aging affects drug use...'You're on drugs, aren't you?' 'You're off your meds, aren't you?'

'HOMELESS - Anything helps - all major credit and debit cards accepted.'

'You probably won't remember the three day week...'

Biological Alarm Clock.

'As your P.R. advisor I suggest that you play on your status as an oppressed and misunderstood minority - but that if you don't want to be moved on you really should change your minority's name to anything that isn't 'travellers'.'

'Time, Temp, Life Expectancy'

'Can I have a dollar to not smash your window?'

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

Support the Ex-Troops

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

Torturing the English Language

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

Thought for today: "All the world's a stage." - Shakespeare. And boy, are there a lot of drama critics.

"What I do is pick up the morning paper, go through it carefully, and then, depending on how I feel about things, I either say the Pledge of Allegiance, stand there and do nothing, or walk out of the classroom."

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

"You know, there are other emojis."

Wifi in Hell

Press Freedom

The Cougher

The Working Woman's Magazine

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"I thought they were cracking down on jaywalking."

"Have you heard? There's talk about raising the retirement age to 170?"

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

Critisize your weight.

'If no man is an island, then what the hell is no woman?'

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

The Berlin Peace Movement

Our Two Parties, Explained

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

"Instead of singing, I'm going to scream offensive things as loud as I can just to get attention..."

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"