Social Snacker Gifts

'Most people wouldn't wantonly eat the hors d'oeuvres if they hadn't read the book.'

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

The Classy Dog: 'Dine & dance hotdogs: '50 cents a dance'.

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

Breakfast surreal.

Liquidity Lunch

'Can you recommend something that will make my date sound interesting.'

"Alexa, tell me ways I can be less of a lazy slob who won't get up to turn off the lights."

Well, O.K., so you found fast food, but what's the hurry?

"Stuffing your face while watching TV does cause obesity."

"Sipsies?"

'Don't take it personally... he doesn't know I'm here either.'

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

'Beer's more than just a food -- it's a comfort food!'

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

"Generally speaking, when his nose gives way, it means he's had enough."

'We've been through thick and thin. Tell me about the thin again.'

Men's Parallel Bars

"I've never been wild about this bar, but it does get you where you want to go."

'OK, remain calm. Who's missing? Milk? Eggs? Cheese? Where'd they go? How much do they know? And will they talk?'

'Cambridge dons of electrical engineering find a way to do toast without going to the buttery.'

"My smarthome just sent me a text saying it's a mess, so it doesn't feel like having visitors right now."

'It's better to drink a little too much than much too little!'

'Once I get started I drink like a fish.'

"I'm at that point in my life where everything calls for a drink."

"If I had it to do all over again I wouldn't change much—maybe part my hair on the other side."

"So what are you planning on giving up for New Year?"

"That summit Johnson! Our goal is the summit!"

'Hold on! Now I remember, you swirl the wine first.'

"Finish every drop - the 5 P.M. cocktail is the most important drink of the day."

Wine and Books Bar.

'My wife has me on a very strict diet so I need a safe place to store my binge foods.'

Sometimes, instead of one big meal, I prefer tapas.