
'It was a complete surprise when the table-setting police arrived. I had no idea I was doing it wrong.'
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'It was a complete surprise when the table-setting police arrived. I had no idea I was doing it wrong.'
Yet another law of the jungle: 'Absolutely NO howling at the moon after 11 PM!
"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"
"Of course it's a stupid sign, but you wouldn't believe how much money it brings in for city hall!"
"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"
"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."
One way only.
Office of the Special Investigator: Stepped out to follow the 'money trail'.
'Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?'
"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"
WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'
'Oh, sure -- NOW you set boundaries!'
"...then click 'save settings', scroll down to 'done' and voila! You're on Facebook stalking Miriam's daughter's new husband."
'Daddy, why is that man wearing a blank T-shirt?'
'Now that we've evolved, we should work on our people skills.'
I told you you weren't allowed to stretch before the seventh inning. Security.
I CAME. I FOLLOWED. I COMMENTED. I SHARED.
WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'
"Keep it 2 metres people!"
No petting in the pool!
Boss, the health inspector is here. Excellent. My hacker just finished restoring all the inspector's social media posts dating back to 1994. Tell him "It'd be a shame if someone's career were ruined by a 20-year-old video of him doing the Macarena in the buff." Don't wink too much. But not too little, either. Very bad man.
'Men are from one branch of Starbucks, women from another.'
"Live life with enthusiasm. Be attentive and eager to please! Sleep only at night! ...and never scratch the furniture!"
Maze of legalities.
'I let Facebook and My-Space do most of the leg work. I just park outside houses wearing a trilby.'
Warning.
End of crisis
Little League Registration: "Um, I think we're gonna need to see your birth certificate again, son. . ."
"As I told you before, I do not allow smoking in my restaurant..."
'We've finally computerized your files. Now we just have to get them off Facebook.'
'What do you mean there's no specific rule that forbids a center fielder from doing that?'
"I think you'll find that the most reliable labour saving device is still money!"
"There were gasps of horror as Nigel appeared holding a mug of coffee."
"He got kicked out of the park for being a litter bug."
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