Social Media Sharer Pillows

"I have this really bad itch on my neck." "What?" "I said... I have this really embarrassing itch on my nether... Speak up, I can’t hear you." "I said, I have this really embarrassing itch on my nether regions, and wondered if you’ve ever had that too." "I’d keep it down if I were you." "Thanks a lot. Thirteen people have already tweeted it."

"Now, is this the kind of painting you mommy would be proud to post on her Instagram?"

'Wow!...Your wife's in an asylum...your elderly dad ran off with a 16 year old punk rocker...your 10th grade daughter is pregnant by her gym teacher...and you're a bisexual alcoholic! What are you going to do??'

Couple in bed. Man says: 'Are you BLOGGING this?'

'You know, it isn't the mother's texting while delivering that bothers, it's those damn selfies they upload to Facebook.

"Congratulations! It's a boy! Quickly nurse! Get her phone and upload a picture to facebook!"

"And in case of an emergency evacuation, please exit the aircraft 'before' posting it online."

"Another Wordle show-off."

"This phone has so many pictures of food, my ringtone is a burp."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"Bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark"

"You wake up after 100 years and the first thing you do is check your phone?"

Wanna talk about it?

"My instagram feed is basically people, dog food, and tennis balls."

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

"Billy, we don't need to feed that vacuum robot."

Sonographer and pregnant couple looking at images of the fetus on a screen with options to share the image on various social media platforms

"I feel like my emotional baggage is permanently stuck on the luggage carousel."

"Well...at least you don't s**t on my ideas."

"Look, previous, your video got 954 likes this morning!"

"It's my box of secrets. It has things I've thought about but would never tell anyone!"

"First of all, this conversation never happened."

Dog's Sandwich

"Get those things away from me- I can't stop eating them."

"Slow down. This stuff is gold, I’m tellin’ ya! Gold!"

"Say 'cheese'!"

Garden of Earthly Delights

"Without your contribution here, th rest would be just meaningless numbers."

'Normally I don't mind regifting but on occasion you get back the same hideous thing you tried to get rid of.'

If Dogs Made Perfume

"Everyone here is bonding over pictures of their dogs."

"As you can see this is pretty embarrassing so I'd appreciate keeping it between you, me and this fence post."

'She blogged her first word today.'