Social Interactions Explorer Pillows

'... and do you bring your beautiful breasts here often?'

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

"Great coffee, Carole."

"Ma'am, why don't you go ahead of me?" "Um... no thanks. Let's let this gentleman go ahead of us." "Oh, no... you ladies go right ahead!"

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

"Call me!"

The four housemen of procrastination

'He's a man of few works. He likes to talk, he just has a limited vocabulary.'

"Maybe you need some kind of app to make it work."

"Ok, so I just texted everybody my commencement speech."

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

"I don't know 'where I've been all of your life', but wherever it was, I wish I was there now!"

Books vs mobile phones

'I've been thinking about quitting, but it's the only thing that gets me out of the house.'

Cyber Dream

"1972: Kim and Doug invited us to their key party... Sounds groovy! 2017: We just got an evite from Kim and Doug to join them on an ayahuasca retreat in Peru... Tommy starts hockey and my father is about to die—no way."

"Such a cute doggie! And I'll bet you make the cutest poopies too, don't you?"

"It's great the way that computer algorithms allow the internet to feed me with opinions that reinforce the ones I've already got - all on my phone!"

"If this is secret information the government doesn't want us to know, how come we can read about it on facebook?"

"Social media makes it impossible to see, hear or speak no evil."

"Can you at least pretend to try and hold the elevator so I won't mull over and over how you didn't hold the elevator."

"Hey, do you want to be in my bubble?"

Traditional wisdom tells us that the brain takes on the shape of what it rests upon.

"I'm enjoying kindergarten except for all the politics!"

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

"You ain't wearin' a brassiere." "How could you tell?" "Cuz the wrinkles are all stretched out of yer face."

Bubbies and technology

"I love to watch cat videos on the internet!"

"Apparently it's demanding offerings."

Hugs and knucklebumps don't mix.

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'

Man looking at a vending machine with a hand sticking out of it and a sign that reads "Put'er there buddy".

"Oh, I see you're busy, so I'll keep talking."

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'