Soccer Strategy Genius Gifts

'Well, you're right, you're not touching the ball with your hands, so the Ref can't penalize you...'

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

"You're a genius, Shaw. This is an idea whose copyright has expired."

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

'I've never seen so many strikers in one team before.'

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

"Look, I know the other team is taller than we are...but I'm pretty sure this isn't allowed."

"Okay...let's concentrate on discussing strategy during halftime."

"Okay, you got this! Who introduced the theory of punctuated equilibrium?"

'This is not what I meant by a free kick.'

'Verily, we wuz robbed!'

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

Football fans discuss a deceased manager: A giant, a legend, much loved. Didn't we sack him?

'Since the playing field was sold off we've become a centre of excellence for one-a-side football.'

"I hear it's because we're right and they're wrong."

'Well, I'm glad to have you with us!'

'Focus! Focus! You've just gotta' forget about their home ground advantage.

"Jim was a model Dad".

'Well, at least there's no chance of you suffering from repetative strain injury.'

"Keep your guard up and don't hold your punches. Whatever you do, watch out for his right hook!"

Jurgen Klopp Caricature

Football Bomb