Snake Owner T-Shirts

'He didn't buy us as pets, he bought us as pet-food: He has a snake!'

'Your shoe's untied.'

Special offer on snakeskin ties.

'I'm so happy I could help you with your allergy to snakes, Miss Medusa!'

"The Englishman goes to the beach once a year to shed his skin."

Eurydice is bitten by a snake

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

'Play it again, Sam.'

"I'll tell ya what we don't need is some Dr. Durango helping us with a dang snake bite."

"You're right—there's no such thing as personal space in a hibernaculum."

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

The deadly sport of cobra staring contests.

Adam and Eve toast next to a serpent bartender.

'Oh don't worry, we had him defanged.'

"I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the problem is with your bladder, Bob."

"I hear they serve Australian swamp rat in first."

Oh, isn't that cute: He's playing with his rattle...

"Charming, absolutely charming."

"Good work Tim, you snatch it all: none of this sharing with your brother nonsense..."

'Timmy, stop being naughty: Don't sit up straight!'

"Oh isn't that your squeeze slithering this way?"

"Okay! Okay! It's a draw!"

John liked to involve his pet snake in his keep-fit programme.

'Well doctor that will be the Mabato Tree Snake.'

Danth battle?

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

"I'm so glad we don't need a selfie stick."

"Doc, you'll be glad to know I'm comfortable in my own skin today. I shed my old in the reception room."

Snake Charmer's Snake on Strike.

"Dude. You seem tense."

St Patrick driving the snakes out of Ireland.

"Your profile didn't mention you being a chewer."

"Trust me to get the awkward one...!"

The Music Critic.

'Ah, beauty in the eye of the beholder!'