Snail Society T-Shirts

"I don't do windows."

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

Wordplay: Gastropod.

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

"I want to make it before I hit thirty."

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

Slug Bait- snails love it

"Trust me. Don't do it."

Local food for local consumption

Snail Racing

"I've invested in property..."

'Do you mind!!?'

Ewww

Snail Pattern Balding.

Snail Man

Snails on road - road works 'slow' sign.

Cartoon showing a group snails, one has a large shell underneath him. Another snail, observing, says to his mate: "Another basement conversion.".

"Wheeeeeeeeeee!"

"Of course I have a little weekend shell in the country..."

'Try one - they're crunchy on the outside with a chewy centre.'

Snail Coach

Snail: 'Do you mean to tell me I'm not a credible author?!'

"You're right, I can totally see my lung."

Snail Mail

Congratulations! When are you due?

'Stress'

"Oh that, that's my holiday home."

'You're gonna love it son! We'll leave our homes for a few days and live in the great outdoors'

"In your own time, Brian, in your own time."

'I'm sorry, but just don't think I can handle a long distance relationship right now.'

Unique Whale Migrating Methods.

'The escargots are underdone.'

Snail crossing

'Yes. I'm from India. . . How did you guess?'