Snack Stopper Gifts

"Sealed for your diets protection."

A fat man watches as a locksmith picks at large padlock chained around the refrigerator.

Just say no.

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

'...And as suburban sprawl continues to grow, many people are finding themselves living uncomfortably close to their wildlife neighbors.'

"You want me to explain how there were two doughnuts in the larder and now there is only one? Easy, it was too dark in there to see the second one."

'I see you're hacking the fridge again.'

'I've decided to get serious about losing weight. I moved the refrigerator out of my bedroom.'

'The trick is to label straight away, otherwise I forget what I have in my larder...'

'Don't take it personally... he doesn't know I'm here either.'

'Could we have a little chat when you're through here?'

'Drop the can opener!'

'You can't expect everything you need to just come falling from the sky'

Be aware of what your food is up to: protect yourself against snack attacks.

Hey Gus, I've managed to steal some crackers and some grapes too...

Colin believed in being ready for any sporting occasion

"How's the diet going?"

'My wife has me on a very strict diet so I need a safe place to store my binge foods.'

'I've decided to help you diet. I had invisible fencing installed around the refrigerator.'

"Dad, what is a meal?"

Sometimes, instead of one big meal, I prefer tapas.

"The face of the pear-shaped man reminded me of the mashed turnips that Aunt Mildred used to serve alongside the Thanksgiving turkey. As he got out of the strawberry-hued car, his immense fists looked like two slabs of slightly gnawed ham. He waddled over

For the grey nomad, life on the road had its challenges.

15 Second Grocery Delivery

"I'm warning you! One step closer and I'll scream!"

"Quick - hide the donuts."

"Yeah, he calls me his best friend alright, but he's never shared his hot chips: not once!"

Fridge with sign - 'Contents may not be suitable for those with weight problems'.

'No alcohol for me thanks: I see enough mirages as it is...'

Book Burp

'Hundreds of years of medical progress, and all you can tell me to do is eat less?'

No Peanut Zone.

"And I got this bachelorhood award for most meals eaten standing in the kitchen hanging over the sink."