Snack Snob Gifts

'I would kill for a truffle.'

Tartine

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Rage.

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

"Don't tell me... you hired a professional decorator!"

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

Love is when you watch television together.

"Trail mix?"

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

How The Sausage Is Eaten

Love is when you watch television together.

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

Psychiatrist says: 'Oh, no! Not another fruit cake?'

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'