Smoking Quitters Pillows

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

He had tried many ways to quit smoking but only one worked.

'I don't smoke. My doctor told me I need to get outside more.'

Top Ten New Year's Resolutions

'Stop smoking. Cut back on your drinking and stay off the floor of the stock exchange.'

"No thanks, I gave up yesterday..."

"It's a vicious circle! He quits smoking, gains 20 pounds, goes on a diet."

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

"The third leading cause of forest fires."

'It's a nicotine patch...I've been smoking too much.'

'I'm thinking of having a gastric band fitted to my cigarettes.'

'You're meant to take off the old nicotine patches before putting on a new one!'

'There you are - it works!'

"I see you went to the hypnotherapist"

'It's a side effect of giving up smoking.'

'I couldn't give up fags, so I've started drinking long-life milk.'

Woman throwing away smoking accessories

'It's a nicotine patch: I'm trying to quit smoking...'

I smoked for thirty years but I've given it up....

I'm giving you a prescription for hard-to-remove stop smoking patches. Place one over the opening of every pack of cigarettes you buy.

'Oh man, I should really give up smoking!'

"There's nothing wrong with my eye. It's a nicotine patch."

'Let's talk about the best way to use nicotine patches.'

Smokers.

'If you stop smoking now, you will add three years to your life. Since you are a lawyer, that's about six thousand billable hours.'

'It took her three months to quit smoking and five years to quit talking about quitting.'

'Do the patches help?'

'I quit smoking weeks ago but Bruno didn't want to go along with the program.'

Eric's nicotine patches were working!

"Give up? Do you realise how hard it was to start?"

'I gave up smoking.'

"I'm down to five a day with this new brand."

The Surgeon General's Army

Man carring plans

"Quit smoking and stay out of the sun."