Smoking Outlaw Gifts

'You tell him to go outside to smoke!'

"It's nice to feel wanted though, isn't it?"

Motorcycles tied to hitching post outside a western saloon

'Yeah, I'm a trife scorpio - what of it?'

'So OK. . . I should quit smoking, but I scratched that off my bucket list years ago!'

"I'm thinking of changing my name."

"You must be the one they call the birthday kid!"

Alcohol and Tobacco Danger

"No, no, I think it's 'two-gun' Pete you're after!"

"Nope, Jeb's my pardner. My partner is Zeke."

'So you've decided to drop the whole 'man with no name' image, have you?' 'Tarquin Chadwick, Gunslinger'

"This chat room ain't big enough fer th' two of us."

"Better watch it, Sheriff. It's said this guy's dang near impossible to shoot and no jail can hold 'im."

"This will maintain your rebellious image in states with helmet laws."

The new normal.

"I'd like to help, pal, but I'm on my way to arrest a guy for violating a 'no smoking' ordinance."

'What the hell d'ya mean 'shoot straight'?! Whaddya think I'm doing?!!'

"I don't understand. I gave up smoking two years ago."

Joe's Weight Gain: '...none of my good pants fit right now...but since we'll be sitting the whole time, I figures it wouldn't really matter...'

"It's from young Joe. He's in hot water with someone named Joycelyn Elders."

"Face it, Earl. We're dogfoodboys."

"Dang it, Seth! Are you still feeding those birds?"

'There's something about beig locked up with a 500-pound gorilla, highly allergic to cigarette smoke, that works every time'

"And just where did that extra vowel come from?"

'This book changed my life. I stole it.'

"Ned's got a fly in his helmet again."

'Allowing prayer time at work...It's a disgrace!'

Railway official telling a traveller not to smoke in the waiting room

Don't smoke.

Designated Smoking Area

Smoking Area