Smoke Sensitive Pillows

'Are you bothered by second hand smoke?'

'Do you mind!!?'

'It's a nicotine patch...I've been smoking too much.'

'I hate having to go outside for a cigarette!'

'...at least it's done something for our image.'

Pollution Look

"Fire, bad. Smoke, good... quite the conundrum."

'Smells good. What is it?'

'So OK. . . I should quit smoking, but I scratched that off my bucket list years ago!'

"The dog wants out again!"

'Quiet with your crisps please, I can't hear the film.'

'There's something about being locked up with a 500lb gorilla, highly allergic to cigarette smoke, that works every time.'

'To cure your dog I suggest you change your aftershave lotion, Mr Lutshbuddle.'

Snowman with 'No Smoking' sign.

'I don't need to exercise to lose weight. The odor in this locker room suppressed all my appetite.'

"It's the gluten-free edition."

"Jordan takes his wife's wind chimes – he shoots!"

igloo smoking zone...

'Garlic or non-garlic?'

"Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, pollen to pollen, mold to mold..." "He was allergic to everything."

'Smoking or non smoking.' 'Huge cigar and smoke.'

Skunk to psychologist: 'It doesn't do me any good to stop and smell the roses.'

An advertisement in an apartment window reads 'Drum Kit For Sale' - the sign in the neighbours window reads 'Thank God!'.

"You know that summer's arrived when you can hear four different radio stations from your own lawn."

Ear Plugs for Aliens.

'Sure, it's nice of the farmer to leave us to graze freely in the mountains, but this darn bell is driving me crazy...'

"No smoking, except in designated Fire and Brimstone areas."

'No giving-up smoking in the workplace.'

Egg farm for sale: 'All that clucking and cackling is driving the owner nuts!'

Hell's Smoking Section

Smoking, Belching, Noises made from armpit.

"I'll be back. I'm just going to get a pack of smokes."

"You're too young to be smoking!"

"Mum thinks smoking is anti-social!"

Other Drug Paraphernalia