Scent Sensitive Pillows

'Garlic or non-garlic?'

Relax,I've no intention of getting into clinches - he's wearing a diabolical after shave.'

'To cure your dog I suggest you change your aftershave lotion, Mr Lutshbuddle.'

Skunk to psychologist: 'It doesn't do me any good to stop and smell the roses.'

"I hate how musty it gets down here."

Woman pouring perfume into her bath.

"But everyone else gets to market their own personal scent!"

Bottom line, is that the sweet smell of success or your aftershave?

"It's our latest scent...Dryer Sheet."

"I'm not saying your after shave smells bad, but.. maybe you should use one mosquitoes don't like so much!"

Aromatherapy for Men

In case of overcrowding in the ER break glass.

'He'll love this cologne. It has the scent of an undervalued stock.'

'Have you tried out new Labrador Retriever Butt Scent?'

''Spiced mill cider and home made apple pie.' Am I supposed to freshen the room with this or have it for dessert?'

'Would Sir & Madam per chance care to peruse the scratch & sniff dessert menu?'

"...And our 'Holiday Scented' candle smells just like credit cards."

'Nothing to give him an excuse to say I smell like a cemetery'

"Do you prefer lavender scent or strawberry?"

'Got anything with a little less musk?'

'Sure I said I love 'new car smell', but not as an aftershave.'

Overpowering perfume

'Maybe the stuff stinks.'

"Great Perfume!"

Dog fetching slippers with a peg on his nose.

"Why waste money on perfume when his favorite scent is stuffed pork chops?"

'I don't smell any drugs, just Old Spice, geezer aftershave.'

"I don't want them to smell fear, so I'm going to roll in something before the interview."

"What pheromone are you using?"

"Scratch and sniff ... it smells like mimeograph paper."

'I don't need to exercise to lose weight. The odor in this locker room suppressed all my appetite.'

'Do you like my new fragrance - It's called 'Surrender'.'

"Mm, you smell terrif- ... no, wait. That's me."

'Oh Darling, I just love the smell of your new aftershave...'

"May I say that's a lovely combination of cyclomethicone, triisostearin, and propylene carbonate you're wearing today, Dr. Thomas!"