Smiling Surgeon Pillows

'He tries to stay happy in his work.'

Haircuts

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

Medical Building Directory: Dr. Larry Nix, Dr. Sally Putty, etc..

The most fabulous Gran in the world.

"He wants to be a plastic surgeon when he grows up."

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

Da Vinci painting a grumpy version of Mona Lisa.

Improvised Dentistry.

Writer Services: We fix plot holes.

'Are you writing my symptoms, or is that your autobiography?'

'Could you tone down the smile just a little?'

9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer.

Locum GP's to be paid for extra work on the BMA agreement

"Doctors, Gilby, Beam and Henson. Ears, nose and throat."

Surgery Instructions.

"They used to call them G.P.s."

"We've determined that it sucks to be you."

"If you don't feel better in a few days give me a call and I'll completely ignore you."

'I give all my new teachers the same advice. Never minimize the transformative power of a smile attached to your words.'

'Just relax Mr Benson. I find having background music while I perform surgery helps me focus!'

'My speciality is referring patients to the right specialist.'

Exploding Face Laughter Strategy

"And I suppost you've never had a friendly wager with a colleague?"

"These aspirin are for me. That patient in room 102 is a real pain!"

'No, Sweetheart. You don't have to turn your head to see the smiley face.'

'As a patient I'm glad because the doctor cured me. As a lawyer I'm sad because there's no reason to sue that guy.'

"Believe me, no one will notice your new braces."

'Just as I thought...made in Alaska!'

'It's a routine operation.'

"I have a complaint about my bill."

"We found traces of conscience, fortunately we caught it early."