Small Town Appreciator Gifts

Welcome signs 'Mediocre, Illinois, home of absolutely nothing at all'

1989 Map Of Sorghum Corners, Ohio

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

Things I love about Powell River...

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

'Oh God I hope that bunch of rednecks aren't waving at me!'

'Cows have bells because their horns don't work.'

Welcome to Yellow Pages, Vermont

Tenafly International Film Festival

Welcome to a Sleepy Little Town - name available on request.

'Listen, McDonald, either knock off the E-I-E-I-O, or I call the sheriff!'

St Bernard Toilet Holder

Impressive! (Cow has stinky smoke signals).

Bird Song.

'I'm afraid to a horse a carrot is just a carrot!'

"You know, Daddy... We should thank a vet every day."

"I'll be grateful for the small things, and you can be grateful for the big things - that way, we'll have it covered."

"Excuse me, have you seen a large gent with a red coat and face to match."

'If we let this happen, soon we'll be swamped in chain stores.'

'Hey Wayne!'

"Have you got it in beige?"

Heaven's Way

"And he hits it, and the other guy hits it back, and the first guy hits it, and the second guy hits it back and-"

It was so quiet in town the residents took to taking chairs to the corner so they could watch the traffic lights change.

What's the best way to stop your milk from going sour?

"And if you press that one, someone will come in and tell you what a good job you're doing,"

"The money's not all that flash here, but you do get recognition for good work."

'Thank you.'

"I think I'll call the new foal Bill. . .He's due at the end of the month."

Miniature removal van in miniature village

'Rock beats Scissors!'

road sign: "Gilkers Corners Population 926

Horse lit up by electric fence. Title: 'Hot Lunch on the Ponderosa'

"It's where I grew up, Diane. A sleepy little town where everybody knows what everybody else is doing, and blogs about it 24/7!"