Small Print Scrutinizer T-Shirts

"I wouldn't spend too long reading it - the first payment's almost due."

Opportunities in Coronatimes

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

Nuclear Security Summit

'There's really no need for confusion. Part 95 of section 33 of Article L in the contract clearly states ...'

CATCHY NAME

Self-Improvement, Self-Empowerment, Self-Aggrandizement

Woman is shocked at seeing her weight, she doesn't realise that her dog is also on the scales.

'You got twenty years for hunting without a license? Kind of stiff, isn't it?'

"It's a cucumber mousse with a mushroom roam, but at least your bill will be substantial."

Good news, I reduced your sentence from 250 years to 150 years!

"I am in the moment - just not the moment you're in."

"There must be an app for this..."

Aways read the small print.

Truth in Labeling: 'Snouts, lips, jowls, cheeks and viscera enclosed in intestine and served on a bun, Mustard optional.'

'Hey, there's a spot - pull in there!'

Bar None

The System is a Punishment for a Past Life

"My wife is quite keen on checking the finer details before we sign anything."

Gonzo Marketing - batteries not included in batteries.

'Apparently it's not suitable for the elderly or children...'

GP motto 'If in doubt call it a syndrome'

Are we what we eat and what do we actually eat?

'I knew there was a catch! Only fifty calories per serving but one small box contains eight serviings.'

Bring down the Airlines.

'I removed the sugar, artificial flavors, coloring, preservatives, and additives. Now the eight ounce box weighs four ounces.'

'The danger of similar packaging.'

Smoking Gun

Say It Ain't So, Ho

'One four ounce serving supplies minimum daily requirement of butylated hydroxyanisole...'

"$865 attorney fee, $198 title insurance fee, $150 administration fee, $135 title search fee, and heck, let's add a $200 'at this point the client probably won't notice anyway' fee."

'Could you give me details of where I can find the nearest Post Office.'