Slow-paced Game Watcher Pillows

"Are you watching these soccer games?"

"I AM at my usual position."

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

'Hey, hey, hey!'

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

Watching the football.

'He's missed six goals today. I bet he could kick himself.'

"Whaddaya say we head home and curl up in front of a nice warm football game?"

"Whoa. Check it out, Doug. Your ex-wife is sitting right below us with that dolt she ran off with..."

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

'Why is laying around watching movies considered cozy, but laying around watching football is considered lazy?'

"...And don't give me that 'I hope his precious little Blackhawks lose' look either!"

... And by the end of the first quarter of the game, the famous 'Man Cave' was completely deserted.

"Dear, there's someone here to collect your soul."

I think you just paid £5000 for cricket box, not a box at the cricket.

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

"Can we fast forward through the 7th inning stretch?"

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

Strike 3! 'Dammit - all I can think about is that $5,350,000!'

"Cricket...six minutes of excitement crammed into six hours!"

Octopus in the bleachers.

'I thought you wanted to get more involved with sports.'

They called her the Olympic Flame because she never went out.

End of football season - UK

"Want to come over Sunday, watch the game, and help me start dreading Monday?"

'I thought you wanted to get more involved with my sports.'

Footbalistas - A group of people passionately dedicated to the all-day broadcast of professional sports."

You really gorge yourself on sports. THEY score and YOU take a victory lap through the kitchen.!