Slob Lifestyle Appreciator T-Shirts

'What do you expect Marjorie, I am a grub.'

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

"No need to remind me. I'm well aware that I've forgotten completely about you."

A man with a shirt reading 'No Pain No Gain' runs past a man who is relaxing with a 'No Pain No Pain' shirt on.

"That's Reubens, he's an alternate lifestyle coach."

'You're a filthy pig, Gordon! I guess that's why I love you so much.'

"I'm running a loose ship."

A man watching t.v. with his skull hinged open to reveal the same man watching the same t.v. . . .

'Bill remembers where he was everybody died.'

Scaffolding team watching TV.

"I lost 5 pounds and you didn't even notice!"

'Must you eat without your shirt on? The crumbs falling into your navel are beginning to compost.'

House Hubby.

"He started off with a lazy eye and it spread to his whole body."

'His bark is worse than his bite.'

'Egads, Fenton! You gave me room-temperature toothpaste.'

'My husband is a police detective. He does know how to toss a room.'

'Call yourself domesticated!'

Whoever said 'change was inevitable' never saw Fred's underwear.

'Speak louder. I can't hear you.'

"Choices, choices- that's what the top of the food chain is all about."

'It doesn't get any better than this.' 'That's what has me worried.'

'He has his own driver, two private secretaries and noe even three personal drones.'

Couch potato with tator tots.

"If I won the lottery, I would go on living as I always did."

"Exercise: Check! Diet: Check! No vices: Check!"

'Maybe it's your diet?'

'I second the motion that we stick to the plan of having no plan.'

'One day son, all this will be yours.'

Humvee stroller

"Meet my husband, Mr Couch Potato, and our son...Tater Tot."

'Leonard has hidden qualities, and they're best LEFT hidden.'

"Yes, sure, pop round - I've got nothing on at the moment!"

'I'm afraid your conditions shows no improvement over last time, Mr. Ferguson -- you must still be doing enjoyable things.'

"The landlord says that there are no animals allowed in this apartment. You've got to move out."