Slice Snob T-Shirts

"Hey, that's your personal pan pizza. NO SHARING!"

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

"Now I really hate poetry."

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"I only like their bad albums – the good ones are too commercial."

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

"I make it myself!"

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

"The wine has subtle hints of expensive pretension, but it's balanced nicely by the screw cap."

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

'Yeah, my home theater even has spilled drinks and popcorn on the floor.'

Wine tasting

'My husband will order the wine. He happens to be a graduate of the 3-Second Master of Wine program.'

"'City Slickers' was O.K., but, let's face it, it was no 'Claire's Knee.'"

'I would kill for a truffle.'

"When a wine rates over ninety, this is not alcoholism."

"Pinot Noir, God's apology for White Zinfandel."

"House red, sir?"

The book is so much better than the film..

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

'Oh man, every time.'

"I wouldn't read that book, dear... it's only there to impress visitors."

"It tastes and smells just like a glass of wine!"

"I used to write page-turners, but my MFA cured me of that."

" will enver read that book, and I"m eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

"I don't wanna 'adult' today."

"YouTube's one thing, but cats will never make it on the big screen."

"It's an unpretentious little wine!"

Prosecco Drinker

"What wine goes best with vodka?"

'Dear, of course no one can tell you what they think of the wine, you haven't told them how much it cost yet.'