Sleeve Roller Gifts

If I had sleeves, I'd roll them up...

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

Fyodor Dostoevsky

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

"Now here's a tale that'll make you hair stand on end"

"It's touching, actually, to see white dudes fumble around for a few last moments in the spotlight."

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

Queen says: 'Mirror, mirror, on the wall ... 'It's all so subjective' is not an acceptable answer.'

"Can you hurry up with that will? I don't have all day."

It was getting harder and harder to stay psyched.

'And all the executive board members got lovely big payouts and lived happily ever after!'

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

"Not more sleeve alterations?!"

'I thought you were going for a walk in the woods. Your porridge has been cooling on the table for hours! '

Fairy tale

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

'Tarzan's younger brother, Ed, was raised by sloths.'

'Pirate's Cove is about a half mile down the beach.'

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

"The Ugly Duckling didn't know why he was so attracted to swan culture."

"'Best wishes'? That's it? That's all you got?!"

'I never saw a tracer bullet that I didn't admire for color, clarity and swiftness.'

'Rapunzel, Rapunzel! Let down your hair extensions.'

"He'd make a wonderful main character for a short story, but I wouldn't put up with him for an entire novel."

Rock on Grandma!

The princess and the key

"Now, can you explain that with a parable?"

'The only means of access was via the previous tenant's hair. But not to worry, there's a ladder 'round the back.'

"So you don't want to come along?"

"She wants the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth."