Sleeping Techniques Gifts

'Yes, she always falls asleep when she does the daily attendance count.'

Man in wheelchair tries to get to sleep by imagining men in wheelchairs jumping over a fence.

"I think I need an extra pillow."

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Cat croissant, cat baguette, cat muffin, cat turnover

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

'I'm not sure which one is the role model.'

'He likes to power nap.'

'I love my new easylife artist's easel.'

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

Wordplay: Hibernation.

"The tide is coming in, sweetheart!"

Night-time halo

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

'I never get a good night's sleep. Thank God for these office meetings!'

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

Babies vs. Dogs

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

Dog tricks. 'He's doing it right now. Dudley dreams in Technocolor!'

'At lone at last.'

"Why is it always me that has to get up just as I'm falling asleep to do things I forgot."

"The bags under my eyes have combined to form some kind of face backpack."

"Gone with the wind with cats" "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." "Me neither, who cares—let's take a nap."

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

"I believe I have just reached a whole new level of cozy."

Sleepwalker on treadmill

'Add the numbers, divide by how many numbers you've added and there you have it-the average amount of minutes you sleep in class each day.'

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

'Hm-m-m - it sleeps most of the time. I think it must be some kind of cat.'

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

"I'm actually pretty ready for bed."