Sleep Science Geek Pillows

"My boss said I have narcolepsy. She could have waited to tell me after I woke up."

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

"I think I need an extra pillow."

Wordplay: Hibernation.

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

A breakthrough in the morning meeting

"I'm down to only one nap a day. From 8 am t0 8 pm."

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

Broken Alarm Clock.

Do not disturb...

'I hate counting sheep. I get enough math at school.'

'Don't take this the wrong way, Honey, but not only have I decided to hibernate this year, but I want to hibernate in the spare room...'

"Clearly the patient's experiencing difficulty attaining the deep, final level of restful sleep."

"I only drink decaf, otherwise I'm awake up to four hours a day."

'It's not Spring yet! Go back to sleep!'

"You were snoring."

"I like to come prepared for meetings."

"What's with your hair?"

Snooze Alarm for Mole.

'It's a soothing sounds machine. Spring Rain, Summer Breeze, and Fall School Bus.'

The next step in executive efficiency - Microsoft PowerNap.

"Well, NOW I can't sleep worrying about how much we spent on this high-tech mattress!"

Fish sleeps while counting worms that jump over a fence.

'How can I get mad at him for sleeping on the job? It was me who told him naps were good for your health.'

'We'll take it!'

'Was it the non-flying dream again?'

"Would you mind getting me the Ambien, the Tiger Balm, three cookies, a cup of tea and a pillow for my legs?"

'She let the bedbugs bite.'