Slasher Fan Gifts

The Horror Film Director.

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

Transylvanian backpackers.

"Are your eel rolls electric?"

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

Toadstools

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

Silence of the Chickens...

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

'Trickle or Spray!?'

Broomstick crash.

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

"Son, you can't get blood from a turnip!"

Beware of Falling Notice.

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"I'm actually pretty ready for bed."

"I lettered in spelling."

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

Do it! Go into the woods alone!...

Open House of Horrors

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

'I'm down to a pack of neuroses a day.'

'We drove 800 miles for this? If I wanted to look at a roomful of dusty bottles, we could have visited your mother.'

Alarmistclock

"Devi's brew?"

"Well, it's been nice. And obviously the £10 million win hasn't change you. . . . A mug of tea an' a couple garibaldies - as tight as ever!"

"Heads or tails?"

Frankenstein's Monster's PC.

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."