Slacker With Shears Pillows

'I'm letting it lie fallow this year.'

"Kindergarten, first grade,second grade, third grade...when do we get to retire?"

"I didn't come all this way to do work."

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

'At least I don't have his life.'

"I enjoy the one day of the school year...that I didn't forget to do my homework."

'Jenkins, about these coffee breaks of yours...'

Bro of Frankenstein

"I don't need to take notes. I'm wearing a wire."

'If anyone's still interested, the definition of entropy is ^,'

"I got it in a novelty shop. But it has decreased loitering around the watercooler with 29%!"

The Sedentary Dead.

Under zealous: ZZZZZZ!

"Won't your boss miss you?"

Intermediate Slouching.

Who...what...why...when...where...whatever...

'... So one day I thought, hey, why walk all the way out to the mound just to take a pitcher out of the game?'

Man in office watching TV instead of a computer monitor.

"Stop doggin' it!"

'I'm on a great career path that never leaves my apartment.'

Oh, The Putzing You'll Do

"Wow! Nice job on that display, Baldo! Just don't tell the boss. He'll make you do more."

He had an accident at work-an idea struck him.

'Out to Hunch.'

'I know but I have to consider him irreplaceable until I figure out what he does around here.'

'You wanted to see me when I woke up?'

'I don't feel like getting out of bed today - Just tell everybody to go with laissez-faire.'

"Guess which one I made with a 3-D printer."

"Have you seen Joey?"

'Mr. Bosley and I will be busy all afternoon investigating offshore opportunities.'

'I don't care if you hit the office football pool - get back to work!'

Board of Censors.

'The weather was much to rotten to go to work.'

Relax, Dobson...I'm not here for another one of your crazy excuses...but it's good to know where to come if I ever need one.