Skydiving Aficionado Gifts

'HAPPIER?! Now you know it works!'

Parachuting with Concrete Shoes

A newborn parachutes to safety after the stork carrying him gets hit by a plane.

The World Wide Web.

'I'm on my way!'

Birds Following Witch.

'I count only four parachutes. Where's Mr. Simms?'

'Helen, you're the team leader, why don't you jump first?'

Why doesn't birdie go soaring on high like other birds?

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

"If we ca change our altitude we can change out attitude."

Grandpa gets more than he bargained for when his lawnmower takes flight as a helicopter would.

'If we're going to be the sponsor of a winter Olympic even, it should be the downhill.'

"I asked my mother to pack my parachute and she packed my lunch instead."

Extra Long-jump

'It is so nice to be able to take a break mid trip...'

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

"Two roads diverged in a wood and I... I... I..."

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

Cupid and parachutists.

Boy asking for bathing machine to be taken out deep so he can dive in.

'One last thing. I want you each to wear these in the off chance that your reserve chute fails.'

'Steady,...not yet,...hold your positions.'

'I take it you've never used an air taxi before.'

'...and the property lies in a beautiful valley by the banks of the river...'

Felix suddenly remembers what the string on his finger is a reminder of.

'Could you throw me the car keys?'

Skier.

"Ever since my great fall, I've been searching for that same adrenaline rush."

'J.B. Potts, Head of Research, Aerodynamics...'

'I've got'em right where I want'em.'

Basic economy

"Free safety demonstration on board the flight?"

"I don't want to alarm you, but it seems that what you have on your back may actually be my backpack."

"Orange juice, 1/2 lb. bacon, dozen eggs, bread, coffee..."