Sky-high Sipper Gifts

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

Running Latte

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

"Look! I can almost spot the bar I should be in right now!"

"This wine tastes like a**....Bring me every bottle you have!"

Anton's Bar and Grill

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

A very fine vintage

Nectar of the Gods Dispenser.

Velvety. And so was the wine.

"And would you like a wine stopper?"

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

'What a relaxing vacation. I've even lost track of the news cycles!'

"May I say, sir, the staff and I just knew you'd see through that Beaujolais."

'Bob will be with you in a moment. He's cleaning the filter to the wine-aroma-judging-device attached to his face.'

Coffee Overload: 'I'll have a low fat soy latte, no sugar, two biscotti...make that a Columbian-Kenyan bean bend...oh make it snappy, I'm in a hurry!'

"Okay, we got one cherry lager, with bitters and a pineapple slice, and one honey malt ale with cinnamon and an orange weist. You want these in steins or parfait glasses?"

'Too acidic? On the contrary, I find it well balanced.'

I say when life hands you a lemon, make lemonade

Scariest Tactics

Paradise: Collection of wine

New for Fall

"Persistent, well-rounded, and full-bodied, with hints of smoke, and just a soupdon of irregularity."

Acme Instant Muscle Ade Machine

The wine was fruity and quite lively.

"Bartender - givish me another shot."

Man battles for his life against 'A Very Lively Little Red'

"Hello, I'm Mike McBride of News Thirteen vacation for Harry Short."

Desert Island Fishing