Skittle Enthusiast T-Shirts

'A man who bowls can achieve anything.'

Love at First Sight

'Thank-you God.'

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"Ours is not a creative clan."

"In the beginning, God created, like, 300 concept sketches..."

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

A Highlander Chasing Dogs with a Knife and a Broom.

"Look, he just wants to apologize for scaring the daylights out of you yesterday. ... Mr. Squirrel? ..."

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

Come on Darling: Surely, you don't need a sledgehammer to crack a nut...

"Yes, that's the tree with all the squirrels from yesterday. And no, I don't know where they are today."

Bob woke up in a pile of notes, some scrawled so quickly that no one could decode them. He remembered nothing of the night before, except... yes, a fleeting glimpse of the writer's moon.

Football Crazy strip six

"Man! That squirrel was jacked!"

"Oh no I left my bagpipes in the oven."

'What is that? Is that sarcasm?'

'Of course I'm squirreling away money!'

'Not only do we have no natural enemies we have no natural friends.'

"I've been getting really excited about squirrels even when my dog isn't with me."

'Well, isn't this nice? Three generations all sitting down together.'

"I meant the dog!"

'Mum, it's not fair: The principal said I was not allowed to take nuts to school anymore...'

'My dentist recommended it.'

On the cusp of winning the Nobel, Bernie gets exposed by his third grade handwriting teacher.

"Consider yourself chased."

Grim Reaper Snack Bar

"If I have this peanut in my pocket, it means I must have buried my keys!"

Lessons from the Blakely Art School (Now Defunct)