Skincare Seeker Gifts

Tips on how to reduce those unsightly crow's feet.

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

"Round and round the cauldron we go, in the exfoliating toner I throw."

"Too much concealer?"

PROBLEM AREAS

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

'You obviously took my suggestion to reduce stress to the extreme.'

"Eternally youthful complexion? Here's the deal. Never go out in the sun. Never eat dessert. And, for God's sake, don't smile."

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

'Nobody minds if I take the ocean view suite with complimentary champagne and Sven, the in-room Swedish masseur, do they?'

'This facial cream is called 'High Definition'...it brings out beauty in sharp, wonderful detail.'

'You need to do something about your dry skin.'

'Have you had a brazilian?'

New Twenty Blades

Desert Dermatologist

Ultimately, the teachers union agreed to a lesser pay increase in exchange for a full-time massage therapist in the faculty lounge.

"Botox."

Sunburn lotion, Windburn lotion.

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

'You do Botox?'

'Who would have thought there was a market for it? We're going to be rich George!...'

She. 'Isn't it a pretty view?' Susceptible Youth. 'Awfully pretty, by Jove!'

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

"Do you have anything that can help remove dark circles from under my eyes?"

"Another barnacle?!" "I was a teenage creature."

"I can Botox it, but I don’t want to freeze up my sixth chakra."

'-and we offer trauma counselling at no extra cost!'

'We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?'

'Here you are Dear, here's a fiver. Go in there and have them make you look like a million dollars.'

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

"A Leading cosmetics company believes our drilling mud would ake an excellent skincare product."

Analysis of Beauty - Plate I.

"Believe me, you never looked better since you fell into that vast of skin cream."

"How come your skin is sooooo smooth?"

"Couldn't you have waited till she was smiling before you injected the botox?"