Skin Care Comedian T-Shirts

'When I said 'I'm breaking out,' I meant that the food here is messing with my acne.'

"Sometimes I wish I could just jump into the dryer and come out wrinkle-free!"

'I Love the touch of your dry flakey skin!'

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

Lady Liberty's Self-Care

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

"I'm saying we lash out for the 'Deluxe' collagen treatment, next time, honey."

"You know Gladys, you seem to be getting younger by the minute. What's your secret?" "I finally decided to get a few injections of bootox. It works wonders!"

Anyone seen my curling tongs?

Medusa, 6 P.M. Friday.

Centurion in a Shower

'Honest, I'm not a toad - I'm a frog with a skin condition.'

"Your eyebrows are beautiful, darling. I know you hate drawing them on."

The eyebrow come over and the nose hair mustache.

Saloon Selectives

"This zit is growing way out of control!"

'Silicone implant ward.'

'There'll be a two-hour recess while I get my hair done.'

'By accident they washed me with a conditioner!'

Shampoo for Medusa's scaley and slimey hair.

Lady Macbeth in the morning

"I'm not really tan. I've had my head in the oven."

Arthur maintains a sense of equanimity not matter what the world situation. Mind you, the Botox helps.

'What's it look like I'm doing? I'm applying hair tonic to my bald tire.'

"I feel bad. My stomach hurts. I'm pretty sure it was something I didn't eat."

'People your age tend to overindulge themselves to death — we doctors call them 'suicide boomers.''

"I envy you. How do you stay so slimy?"

"Will these hooves ever dry?"

"My hair always looks awful in the winter."

'It appears you have dry scalp.'

"Either she's had a lot of Botox, or her face is buffering."

'So I still haven't met anyone else who has a blow dryer that requires two people.'