Skin Care Satirist T-Shirts

"I'm not really tan. I've had my head in the oven."

"Sometimes I wish I could just jump into the dryer and come out wrinkle-free!"

Bald Man Overcomb

'I Love the touch of your dry flakey skin!'

The return of Miss Subways

'Dwayne deeply regretted not placing his mother in a personal haircare home earlier.'

Lady Liberty's Self-Care

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

Toilet roll beauty tips.

'Eureka! It won't cure anything, but the side effects are terrific!'

"This one is called 'Essence of Hockey Bag.'"

Classical Beauty: "My secret is to eat lots of olive-skinned men."

Medusa, 6 P.M. Friday.

'Honest, I'm not a toad - I'm a frog with a skin condition.'

"Your eyebrows are beautiful, darling. I know you hate drawing them on."

'It's so ironic: I finally win a prize at a raffle and it has to be a free pedicure!'

Centurion in a Shower

Bald hairdresser recomending hair restoring lotion

Saloon Selectives

Leo and Florence Wolfe play medication commercial BINGO during the nightly news.

'There'll be a two-hour recess while I get my hair done.'

"This zit is growing way out of control!"

R. Dough, M.D. - Eye, Ear, Nose, Throat & Big Pharma Stock.

"… Yes, but you only have to take it once a year."

Obvious Comb-Over: Please Give.

'By accident they washed me with a conditioner!'

Non-Smoking and Non-Urinating End at Swimming Pool

Shampoo for Medusa's scaley and slimey hair.

Lady Macbeth in the morning

Life before fitness trackers.

Werewolf prone? Try our MoonBlock.

'When I said 'I'm breaking out,' I meant that the food here is messing with my acne.'