Skin Care Aficionado Pillows

Dermatologist: Rash decisions made here.

"Worst case of dry scalp ever!"

Botox sharpei

'I'd really like to do something about these spots.'

Classic Cell/Cellulite

'My youngest provides me free mud.'

'My acne is worst on the dark side.'

'You trying to tell me something, Alice?'

"Sure I used drugs when I was your age, but they were all prescribed for acne."

'How to Remove Spots and Humps'

"So did you get an appointment with the pachydermatologist?"

"Well, in case you're not aware, eczema is a natural part of an armadillo's physiology."

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

Shampoo.

"Too much concealer?"

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

"I don't like your application."

"Eternally youthful complexion? Here's the deal. Never go out in the sun. Never eat dessert. And, for God's sake, don't smile."

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

'This facial cream is called 'High Definition'...it brings out beauty in sharp, wonderful detail.'

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

'You need to do something about your dry skin.'

'Apply that ointment as directed and call me if the growth does not reduce or it starts to talk.'

New Twenty Blades

Desert Dermatologist

"Wow, your mane looks fantastic! New conditioner?"

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

Sunburn lotion, Windburn lotion.

'You do Botox?'

"Look on the bright side – the Rogaine worked!"