Skill Maximizer Gifts

Some jobs are less satisfying than others because they use few of the jobholder's skills and abilities, and the job itself forms only a small part of the finished product.

Let's get organized

The Evolution of the Bonus

"It's simple supply and demand. The shorter the supply, the more money we demand."

'I'm not motivated by profit, Henderson - I'm motivated by excessive profit.'

Remember take time to stop and smell the profits.

Am Awful Crammer.

'I'm working because I've been upgraded. He never upgraded so he's out of work.'

'That was when I closed five distribution centres, mothballed a factory and sacked 3,000 workers.'

"As you can see, we're happy with the sales report."

"How are my sales doing?"

"Thanks to my cost-cutting policies, profits are up 59%."

Keys to Success: Focus, Alertness, Concentration...

"How learning curves feel... Before: Holy hell During: I'm not gonna make it! After: That wasn't so bad! The next time: Again?!!"

"More important than money?! There's only one thing more important than money and that's more money!"

Why is it the universe keeps expanding but there's never any room in my closet?

You are more than your job description.

'We're looking for a sales manager that can take our sales momentum, during December and January, and carry it over for the year.'

"I was hoping for more from you 'Mission Statement' than, 'earn a s******d of money'!"

'And I repeat. Live each day as though it were your last.'

Resume Advisor. I'm not sure "internet troll" is a resume enhancer.

'Oh, look, honey - the master closet has a walk-in bedroom!'

"Your dedication and hard work have completely turned this company around. I guess you're no longer needed."

"Good thing I listened to you and implemented the new strategy."

"It's this marvelous little liberal-arts college in Kansas that gives frequent-flier miles."

You've got to hand it to George..he NEVER lets a sale go without a fight.

"Our training program was too successful. Twenty employees used their new skills to leave the company for better jobs."

"Ha! No labour costs! No production costs! Man, our profits will go up like a rocket!"

"These investments aren't without risk. Your mailbox might explode with prospectuses."

Community Bed de Luxe

Everyone thinks they can do it

'When I hired you Curtis, you were a skinny wimp. Are you sure you're not on steroids?'

Harold pushed the 25 coffee refills to the limit

"Frank doesn't like to waste a minute of his vacation."

'We believe in putting people before profits. We put people in China to leave more profits here.'