Skiing Spectator Gifts

'Keep it down, will you?! I'm trying to watch the skiing weatherview!'

"I AM at my usual position."

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

G7 Summit Concern

Guide reading book called 'A farewell to arms.'

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

"Since you're skiing down to the store, we could use a whole lot more steaks."

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

They've been inseperable since the avalanche.

'I love the mountains and all, but I simply can't do this....I'm just too chicken.'

Clown Skis.

'If we're going to be the sponsor of a winter Olympic even, it should be the downhill.'

"You have to pick the places you don't walk away from."—Joan Didion, Penny, Joan Didion.

'It is too snowing!'

"Whaddaya say we head home and curl up in front of a nice warm football game?"

Travel looks strong!

Cockroaches struggle to use the ski lift.

'Isn't that the ghastly couple we met last summer in Rock?'

A convenient attack of swine flu...

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

Waiting for the snow to arrive in Aviemore.

'Why is laying around watching movies considered cozy, but laying around watching football is considered lazy?'

"I was only kidding when I said you have ring around the collar."

Skiing at Sea

"Whoa. Check it out, Doug. Your ex-wife is sitting right below us with that dolt she ran off with..."

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

Little girl skiing.

"This is a ritzy ski report - it's all fake snow."

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

Piste-side Hotel

I think you just paid £5000 for cricket box, not a box at the cricket.

"If you got us lost ... I am so eating you first."

Ski lift.