Ski Accident Recovery Pillows

"Is it too late to buy a policy?2

First aid in mountains

Barbeque Casualty.

'This is Onstar, how may I help you?'

They've been inseparable since the avalanche.

'You brought my slippers?... What kind of rescue dog are you?!'

'After giving a recorded statement to these people, being grilled by 60 Minutes would seem like a piece of cake.'

"Since you're skiing down to the store, we could use a whole lot more steaks."

'I've only come to get my nail back.'

They've been inseperable since the avalanche.

'It is too snowing!'

'GESUNDHEIT!!'

"I didn't see the coffee table in the middle of the room, due to my visual impairment, caused by the rubbish light emitted by the government approved 150 watt energy saving bulb in my apartment..."

'...but besides this, how are you doing?'

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

Big slipper.

'It was a rare accident. Lightning struck his bed pan.'

"You call all this a side effect?"

Skiing at Sea

'This is your lucky day!'

Little girl skiing.

'I have this horrible premonition that he's turning into a butterfly.'

"The good news is, I got religion!"

Piste-side Hotel

"This is a ritzy ski report - it's all fake snow."

'Now that's what I call a rescue dog.'

"And as if that wasn't bad enough. They've discovered that I'm allergic to bandages!"

Man crawls out of avalanche to see two rescue dogs relaxing.

"I got knocked down while jogging in heavy traffic."

'So, tell me once more how climbing trees is healthier than playing computer games.'

'Talking to John always raises my self esteem. He's such a great listener!'

Reindeer on Skis.

'It's almost time to get the cross-country skis out and dust them off.'

'It's good news - the car can be repaired'

"Stop moaning. I said I'm sorry."