Skeptic Smiler Gifts

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

Fear/Knowledge

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

"It's such a lovely day!"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

"Let's face it. The only play you've ever liked is 'Stop the World - I Want to Get Off.'"

"Imagine if only 1/2 the companies that claimed to have a great culture actually did."

"I don't think those are authentic, either, bud."

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

Another Bigfoot sighting...

A political promise is intended to be a golden egg...Which is kept in a pork barrel and after an election...Hatches into a dead duck before...it turns invisible so it can quietly vanish.

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

"Do you think the flat earth society has members round the globe?"

Channelling on the Cheap

Follow Science or Your Weird Sky God

'Do you believe in reincarnation?' - 'I don't now, but I did when I was Napoleon.'

Rumors, lies and innuendo.

'See, dear, you can't believe everything you read. It says so right here on the internet!'

'If I've learned anything, it's believe half of what's in the newspapers, and even less of what's in your e-mail.'

The new Physics

'Oh my!...Corn circles, Roswell, aliens, pyramids - there's a connection!...'

"About the vaccine, I read online that it was so Bill Gates could inject us with CHIPS!"

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden.

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

"We fell for this last time remember..."

"And he had it peer-reviewed by his fellow pseudoscientists."

'I might give you the benefit of the doubt. But I doubt it.'

'Remember, son, don't believe any thing you hear and only half of what you see.'

"Let's try to think of something that untold millions of people will buy."

"Why do I hate religion? Imagine if half the money ever donated to religion had instead been used for scientific research. That's the world religion stole from me! Instead of worrying about the coronavirus, I could be slaying orcs on a starship's holodeck!"

Govt. UK led by Seance

"Call me crazy, but this guy is really starting to worry me..."

"I'm back from Russia. Putin offered me a Dacha to say he's an honest man."