Skepticism Seeker Gifts

'It's a wonderful find, and yet there's something suspicious about it.'

"Wait a minute, are you trying to tell me that the Great Reset isn't a conspiracy theory?"

"Thank you for the religious pamphlet, do you have a number I can mock you at if the world doesn't end on the date you describe below."

"We fell for this last time remember..."

'You know, folks, if they still haven't made you paranoid enough, here's something ELSE for you to think about.... What if Benghazi was just a DISTRACTION?'

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

"So, you say I'll be doubling the numbers of animals I kill?"

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

'Your videotape's intriguing - But it still doesn't prove that they really exist.'

Skeptic Tank.

"Let's face it. The only play you've ever liked is 'Stop the World - I Want to Get Off.'"

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

"Your assumption that a one in a million chance event MUST be a miracle shows you drastically underestimate the total number of regularly occurring events."

"Imagine if only 1/2 the companies that claimed to have a great culture actually did."

The Government's Got Your Back. And Wants Your Front As Well.

"I see you're back from church. What was cherry-picked for you today?"

A political promise is intended to be a golden egg...Which is kept in a pork barrel and after an election...Hatches into a dead duck before...it turns invisible so it can quietly vanish.

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

'If I'd known these programs were going to be so fake - I'd be psychic!'

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

'Oh my!...Corn circles, Roswell, aliens, pyramids - there's a connection!...'

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

"I understand the allure of religion. It offers hope in a world that's often cruel and unfair. But religion's promises have been consistently proven false. Science, on the other hand, has actually delivered the things that improve human life...."

"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"

"You atheists wouldn't exist without God!"

"Behold! I am God! I know all. Yet I'm constantly testing you even though I already know what you'll do. But I'll still punish you for the sins I planned for you to do. And you'll suffer in a fiery pit, tormented beyond imagining forever and ever and ever

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden.

"You say we atheists are going to Hell? Look at all the f**ks we give... Go ahead... Look at them all."

Asteroid Denying Dinosaur vs. Asteroid Believing Dinosaur.

"Dont believe anything those guys have told you. None of it. It's all B.S."

"Why do I hate religion? Imagine if half the money ever donated to religion had instead been used for scientific research. That's the world religion stole from me! Instead of worrying about the coronavirus, I could be slaying orcs on a starship's holodeck!"

"If you prayed to Google instead of God, you might get a constructive response."

Scientific Research: 'Uh...why'd it take'em 20 yeahs t' figyah that out?'