Skating Fan Gifts

A note from Tessa Virtue - Scott, why don't we just tell the world we are married and get it over with

A tortoise toboggans down a hill in its shell

Yeah, I've been driving in circles for an hour looking for a place to park. Zamboni.

"I love this time of year."

Hammer Thrower - "Let go of it!"

Running out of Gas.

Centaur Sprinter

"Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes..."

Raging Bull on Ice

"Yeah, but this is a cat on a skateboard being arrested by a cop with a tattoo of the Confederate flag!"

Peacock on skateboard

'I was this close to the finish line and then somebody threw a stick!'

"Just be proud we're the first father-son ice dancing team."

'Hey, come back with my laptop!' 'Ha, some spy he is!'

'They're halfway through the six-meter dash. At this pace, the winner should break the world record by at least 24 hours!'

Plastic Brits: 'Apprehend that fleetfooted alien and naturalise him for Team GB!'

'Will that be on the rocks?'

"Seriously, Ice-Skating? You want to try out Ice-Skating?!"

Man planning on standing on a turntable to aid hammer throw.

Who said money was not a motivator?

Sleeping in skis.

'Runners to your mark. Get set... wait! Lane three! Turn sideways!'

Penguins - one is skating.

"Now, don't move, I'm going to practice my high jump and need a good landing mattress..."

Prisoner does Shot Put with an Ankle Ball and Chain

Winter Olympics

"He believes it will freeze over any day now."

White Wine on Ice!

Damaging to the sport's reputation...he's fallen asleep.

'How'd you wind up with two batons?'

Lake Skater

'Just keep running straight until you reach the end. Can't miss it.'

Triple Jumper.

Bear Snowboarding

"That was a Salchow. With Axels, they fall on their buns."