Skateboard Defender Gifts

'Poor old fellow all hunched over and barely able to walk. I should let him park near the exit and give him a discount.'

"Skate or die."

Skate Bored

'You sure your dad won't mind if we use his silicone spray?'

'I think your son is being bullied. He's suffering 80% Chinese wrist burns.'

Active pensioner.

'I'd kill for concrete.'

I defend to the death your right to say things I agree with.

"My dad said they used to be bands."

"You're pathetic."

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

Art Theft

'I wish I could be around when you're my age. I'd like to see that fashion statement with an adult diaper showing.'

"I don't care what your friends say! This "nine lives" business is just an urban legend: think safety first!"

Skateboarder discovers his local 'Skate Park' is occupied by parked flatfish.

'I think my wife is trying to kill me -- she bought me a skateboard.'

'Wow, thanks for finding my skateboard, daddy!'

"You left your goddam car in the driveway again!"

"I've estimated that I've given you over $100,000 in tech-support over the years. Since you're my dad, I'll give you a discount. I'll take a skateboard."

Canadian Jesus

"Police. Nobody move or groove."

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

'The frozen snow on Kilimanjaro is perfect for a skateboard, he said. I'll never listen to that dumb monkey again!'

'The head of our script department!'

A skateboarder falling on his head

Skateboarding

'Regarding your skateboarding accident: I need a note from your wife as to why you did something so stupid.'

"Has it ever occurred to anyone that if we stopped wearing these damned skirts we wouldn't have to march off to defend our manhood every five minutes?"

'Have you got something that smells like a skateboard?'

'Dude! You forgot your helmet!'

"If you can hear me, give me a sign."

'She's still a little annoyed with you for breaking her skateboard!'

'You conned me into this date - boasting about having your own transport!'

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

"I think you've done a fine job of protecting the underlying canvas from the elements with paint."